I have a confession to make.
At times, I get really frustrated with her progress. Well, her lack of progress would be more like it. Her fur looks much better than it did at the end of December. But in reality, that’s about it.
Some days it looks like she might be getting better, but other days, it doesn’t. And my frustration comes from the part of me that can’t understand why all of my working with her isn’t making a difference.
She ate A/D yesterday. She liked it. She ate Felidae that I’d soaked in water. She liked it. But she just loses interest. Sometimes I wonder if maybe she had a stroke and she’s slowly recovering from it. But maybe it’s something else. She still has a hard time dropping her head to eat. She does better when I raise the food up for her.
Brian and I discussed her yesterday. Comparing her to DeeJay. DeeJay, until his last few days, had a very healthy appetite. He was as skinny as a rail, but he had a healthy appetite. He begged in the kitchen, he begged by the table. He wanted to eat. He liked to eat. And when he quit eating, well, I knew that was it.
Annie hasn’t eaten well since December. She’ll nibble, but she really doesn’t have much of an appetite.
I told Brian I’m going to give her fluids every day and see if that makes a difference. I’ll try it for a week or two, to see if it helps. If she shows a marked improvement. If she doesn’t, I’m not going to keep her on pills and fluids for God knows how long. Because it’s not helping.
And I’m getting tired. So tired of feeling like I’m wasting my time. I just start to thinking that I don’t want to do this anymore. That I want my life back. I want my desk back. I don’t want a cupboard full of syringes and needles and fluids. I just get so tired of it all.