Yesterday, my mom said some things to me that made sense. She told me that it’s hard for her to eat when I’m there, because she just waits for me to jump on her. Which, in retrospect, I’ve been doing.
And after much thought, I’ve realized that it’s not a good thing for either of us. So, I’m going to avoid mealtimes; there’s no telling what time they’ll bring her lunch, so I’ll be going earlier to visit and leave when the food arrives. She knows she has to eat to live. She gets that now. She’s a big girl and she’ll eat if she wants to.
I told Brian this last night and at first, he tried to, not really argue, but get back to ‘she has to eat to live’. And I told him “if she wants to eat, she’ll eat. Getting pressure from me won’t change that one iota. Look at your father. He was in a residential care facility for over two years and he just quit eating. No amount of getting after him changed that and it eventually killed him. It was his choice.” He thought about it a little and said “I guess you’re right”.
If mom eats, she eats. It’s her life.
Today she gets to go in to have her teeth cleaned, have two cavities filled and be fitted for new dentures. She’s scared. She told me this yesterday. I asked her why and she said “I hate needles”. I don’t blame her.
She’s reading a lot better. I had one of those little books “Live, Learn and Pass It On”, with one liners of what people of various ages have learned in life, from 6 to 96 years old. She likes that book. She isn’t reading it on her own that I know of, but she read four pages to me yesterday. The first day she read, it was only one.
She didn’t want to walk yesterday, either. I think her mind is starting to function better and she’s overwhelmed.
But today, we’ll have an adventure. And I’ll be there for her.
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